Summer at the Movies: 2022 Edition

Okay, so while mid-July may seem a tad bit premature for a “summer at the movies” post, I can assure you all, all of the BIG blockbusters have been released and while there are several more on the horizon I’m looking forward to seeing, all the Marvel and similar behemoths are already out there at your local multiplex, so let’s take a look at what I loved and what I didn’t…

Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness – Worst piece of crap I’ve ever seen. Marvel has delivered three duds in a row for me with this one (the first two being The Eternals and Spider-man: No Way Home.) I went into Doctor Strange 2 with a great deal of excitement having very much enjoyed the first, but was woefully unprepared for the monstrosity I was met with. It’s an utter failure to one’s audience to expect them to have seen every single Marvel Disney+ show and the past half dozen recent Marvel movies in order to comprehend the plot of the current film. I miss the old days when you just had to see Doctor Strange 1 in order to know what’s happening in Doctor Strange 2. LESS IS MORE MARVEL! LESS IS MORE! Also, I’m sick to death of these damn Easter Eggs as they call them, how many nods to the past and dumb nostalgia blasts do we really need? They clog up the story and often a time feel forced, I hate them. My biggest complaint with Marvel now though is that NOTHING REALLY MATTERS anymore! Anything is anything and everything is nothing all at once. It’s all become a bunch of stupid nonsense and I’m just about over it. If a beloved character dies, don’t worry, it never really happened because it did in an alternate universe, so that person will be back in a future film. Dumb. Shame on Marvel for making all this junk garbage. With budgets the size of theirs, they should NEVER produce a single bad film, much less three in a row. Do better Marvel. Also, this movie felt like it was four hours long, but was only two hours and six minutes. 0/10. Wouldn’t Recommend – at all!

Top Gun: Maverick – Cinematic gold. THIS is how movie’s should be! Marvel, take note! This may surprise you a bit, but I’d never seen the first Top Gun in its entirety until two nights before we saw Maverick! I’d seen plenty of bits here and there, but never all at once. Obviously I LOVED the first one, so went into this new one with lofty expectations and honestly, I thought Maverick was even better! I was so emotionally attached to the story and characters that I was literally loving every single second! Although his personal life may be a bit peculiar, Tom Cruise is one of the all-time Hollywood greats and I can’t think of a single movie he’s in that I don’t thoroughly enjoy. He’s consistent in his craft and this is Tom Cruise at his absolute best! What a triumph for someone who’s been making movies longer than I’ve been alive (which again, is 29 years). Top Gun: Maverick isn’t just one of the best movies of 2022, it’s one of the best movies, period. Everyone needs to see this legendary film. It’s definitely one I could watch time and time again. I cried four times and the new Lady Gaga song, Hold My Hand, continues the legacy of great music in these Top Gun movies. 10/10. Highly Recommend!

Jurassic World: Dominion – WHAT IN THE CRAP WAS THIS!?! Honestly, as much as I hated Doctor Strange 2, I hated this even more. I LOVE the Jurassic films, but this movie was a complete and total abomination. In what should’ve been an epic conclusion to a thirty year franchise was instead the most insane bunch of nonsense I’ve seen in ages. There were so many subplots going on simultaneously that it was ridiculous and somehow bizarrely uninteresting to follow. Making Chris Pratt’s character a 007/Mission Impossible type on the run from crooked smugglers AND dinosaurs was just too stupid to handle. I could’ve got up and left right then and there, but I held onto false hope that it would eventually get better. It never did, in fact, it just gets worse and worse and more and more unbelievable, which is truly saying something given the fact that I’m talking about a movie that depicts dinosaurs and humans sharing the same planet. There was one point when I looked at Melissa and said, “how much longer can this shit be, I have to poop,” and she replies, “fuck, there’s another 70 minutes!” I about pooped myself right there in shock that this damn thing wasn’t closer to being over. It was drawn out and felt eternal in the worst possible way. I found myself wishing that the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs millions of years ago would miraculously stage a comeback and wipe me out right then and there so I didn’t have to sit through anymore of this jurassic junk! I do hope though that the cast got paid a TON because they had to know what a shitty script they were all being forced to deal with. Talent wasted. 0/10. Wouldn’t Recommend to anyone, EVER! Honestly one of THE WORST movies I’ve seen in my entire life. Zero redeeming moments, I hated everything about it. Universal Pictures should be ashamed.

Lightyear – Beautifully touching and one of my absolute favorite Pixar message films. There was so much dumb controversy surrounding this movie like people up in arms because it features a lesbian character – so what? Plus, it was so subtle that one could’ve nearly blinked and missed it, but it was tastefully included and I appreciated that inclusion. Tim Allen not being Buzz Lightyear, this actually makes sense because Tim Allen’s Buzz is a toy that Andy plays with in the Toy Story franchise, this Buzz Lightyear is from the movie that Andy would’ve watched that would’ve made him want the Buzz Lightyear toy. This isn’t the same Buzz Lightyear, so why that was a problem I’ll never know. People love to complain about dumb shit, but given that all these complaints came prior to the film’s release tells me that none of these complainers actually saw the movie for if they had, I’m sure none of these issues would’ve been. The film was remarkable in its delivery. I felt that the pace was consistent and I was eager to see where the movie was headed the entire time because I honestly had no clue and I loved that about it. I was incredibly invested in the journey of Buzz and his new friends and thought this film was most definitely consistent with Pixar’s peak storytelling. The message of slowing down and living life versus merely existing in it was beautiful and brought tears to my eyes on two separate occasions. I loved Lightyear and am looking forward to it debuting on Disney+, so I can watch it again and again for it’s definitely worth repeat viewing. 10/10. Highly Recommend.

Elvis – I. Loved. This. Movie. I thought I was going to enjoy it, but let me tell you what, I LOVED it so, so much. I literally listened to nothing but Elvis’ music for the entire week following seeing this movie. It gave me such a greater appreciation of him and his music and left me with a great deal of sorrow in my heart for him and his loved ones. The parallels between his life and Britney Spears’ really cut me deep and there’s one scene in particular with him and Priscilla that just gutted me to my core. Austin Butler truly deserves the Oscar for Best Actor because there is NO ONE doing what he did. He didn’t just play Elvis, he was Elvis. Tom Hanks was excellent as always, but being the villainous Colonel Tom Parker showcased his acting skills in a different light, a much darker one at that. This movie was brilliant from start to finish and if there would’ve been a later show that night I would’ve went and got tickets to see it again. I cannot stress enough how beautiful and extraordinary this movie was. Suffice it to say, I’m not planning a trip to Memphis, Tennessee to visit Graceland because this film left me feeling extremely inspired! 10/10. Highly Recommend.

Thor: Love & Thunder – Marvel finally delivered something enjoyable. While this wasn’t quite as thrilling as the third installment in the Thor franchise, it was most definitely on par with the first and second chapters. I thought it was pure summer entertainment. There were these two goats that made this absolutely awful noise that I hated and thought were unnecessarily stupid and a few other little bits here and there that I wasn’t vibing with, but overall, this was classic Marvel. Thor is such a good character though that its difficult to not enjoy his stories. Christian Bale was excellent as the villain, Gorr the God Butcher. Marvel usually has crap villains for me, but this was most definitely an exception. The ending was a bit peculiar and I didn’t see coming, but I didn’t really hate it either, it was just odd. Overall, this movie was fun, enjoyable, and a perfect summery escape. 8/10. Would Recommend.

Sneakerella – This masterpiece can ONLY be found on Disney+ and let me tell you all what, I think it was the single best movie of the year. Now granted I did go into this with uncertain expectations, but ten minutes in I looked over at Melissa and without missing a beat we both began professing our love for this film. It was a wonderfully fresh take on the Cinderella story and one that ended even more happily than the others! I had the soundtrack on blast for days and days following our initial viewing! Not going to lie, I’m lowkey obsessed with this movie now and think that anyone and everyone NEEDS to enhance their lives and see it! You will NOT be disappointed for it really is SIMPLY THE BEST! 11/10! HIGHLY RECOMMEND!

As always, THANK YOU so much for viewing! Which of these films have you seen this summer? Please feel free to leave me a comment below as I LOVE reading and responding to them! I’ll return next week with another all-new post, so until then, I wish you all, all the best in your weekly endeavors!